THE BLAME GAME
" I've had enough of your drama. You can either commit to the relationship for real or this is over!"
"You have a lot of nerve talking about my commitment issues. At least I'm not all over the city with 10 different girls."
This was just one of the fights which plagued the so-called relationship of Yug and Amira. They had started off as friends which went on to become really serious and then this. Nobody knew how the "totally in love" couple had come to become the "can't-stand-each-other" couple. They met in high school and started talking over shared interests and their classmates. After high school, Yug went on to do engineering from Delhi Technological University and Amira was pursuing Textile Designing from NIFT. What started as friendship, blossomed into love and they started dating. they couldn't believe they were so compatible with each other. Yug was not the macho,suffocating, possessive boyfriends that Amira had heard of and she wasn't the nagging, controlling and tormenting gold-digger girlfriend. They gave each other space but still managed to forge a deep connection.
All was well for about a year and then it started falling apart. Yug was one of those guys who were very popular in college. He was good looking, his family was well off and he wasn't pathetic in studies. Also, he was a good dancer and a leader. Everything was going good for him in the college. People paid attention to him. He got on the Student Council and started taking responsibilities. He became a known face around campus. boys wanted to be him, and girls wanted to date him. Amira was happy for him but she started feeling neglected. She was proud of all that he had done for himself, but it seemed like her achievements didn't matter anymore. When she got selected as one of the designers to showcase her designs in the Indian Fashion Week, she was on cloud nine. Yet, when she told Yug about it, he didn't seem too thrilled. All he could talk about was how much he was looking forward to working on his college fest.
Amira was disappointed and dejected, but she didn't let it get to her. She still loved him but she knew she didn't want to commit to a serious relationship before knowing that this would last in the long haul.
The show was in Mumbai and she had to leave for 2 weeks. She went to Yug's place to tell him about everything and also to talk to him about the problems she was having. she wasn't going to keep things hanging. That's when she received a call from her best friend telling her that Yug was all over another girl in a nearby coffeeshop. She couldn't believe it. She refused to believe it. So, her friend called her over to the place to see for herself. She couldn't believe her eyes when she saw him openly flirting with that girl. That's when she realised that this wasn't the first time someone she knew had told her about seeing Yug with a lady, and every time she'd just shrugged saying it was a friend. She had always given him the benefit of the doubt because she knew that he would always come up to her and tell her if anything was going wrong. She left the place that night, but she knew that she had to talk to him about it before it was too late and they became one of those people her friends laughed about.
Suffice to say that it did not go well.
Amira left for Mumbai the next week. She was worried about Yug because they hadn't really hashed out all their problems. But, she knew that he would never do anything to hurt her. He might not be the perfect boyfriend but he was still her best friend. She had faith in him. And, she wanted to concentrate on the fashion show. She wanted it to be perfect. It was her chance to make a dent in the fashion industry with her style statements. The first week passed in finding and finalising looks and getting all the things ready for the models. The dress rehearsal was perfect and everything was on track. She was ready to make the most of this moment.
When she came back after the show, she was still reeling in from the effects of what happened in Mumbai. She had never expected to be noticed by one of the leading fashion designers in the country and to be given a chance to intern for his fashion house. She couldn't wait to tell Yug the news. She knew that things between them weren't really good, but she was ready to forget everything. He deserved a second chance and she knew that they were not over yet.
But, that did not happen.
They broke up. He asked her to reconsider. He wanted to get back with her. She said that this was the best thing for the both of them. She never told him that she had seem him with another girl, doing much more than just flirting. She didn't tell him that she cried all night over the fact that she didn't just lose her boyfriend, but she lost the guy who was her best friend.
Amira graduated from NIFT. Her parents threw a party in honour of her graduation and starting her internship in Mumbai. They called all her friends from college and high school. Yug was invited too. She was glad to see that he was doing well for himself. He came up to her to congratulate her on the graduation and new job.
"I had no idea that you got a job in Mumbai. That's so cool. You'll be designing for real celebrities now. when did this happen?"
"Thanks. Oh, the internship was offered to me when I went to Mumbai for the fashion show"
"Huh? When did that happen? Was it back when we were together?" asked a surprised Yug.
"Yeah, remember I told you I had to go to Mumbai for 2 weeks? They offered me the internship after the show. It doesn't matter. I see you're happy now."
"yeah, I am. But, it could have been us if you'd only listened to me once. I was ready to give this another chance. I never knew why you broke when you could have given us a second chance. It could have been perfect."
"Is it really the time to talk about it? you might blame me for the break-up but I think it was the right thing to do. you're happy with Samira now and I'm really happy for you. Enjoy the party."
People find it so easy to blame someone for an outcome they don't like. "if only you did this, if only you listened........", the list will go on. It's so easy to just burden one person with the guilt of making a decision. What we seem to forget is that regardless of who we want to blame for something that went wrong, it's finally us who has the last say in the matter. Life is not a one way street. Yes, people get scared and yes, people are afraid. But, if we roll over and let others guilt us into doing something, we're no better than them. The Blame Game will only continue as long as someone keeps feeling guilty.
"You have a lot of nerve talking about my commitment issues. At least I'm not all over the city with 10 different girls."
This was just one of the fights which plagued the so-called relationship of Yug and Amira. They had started off as friends which went on to become really serious and then this. Nobody knew how the "totally in love" couple had come to become the "can't-stand-each-other" couple. They met in high school and started talking over shared interests and their classmates. After high school, Yug went on to do engineering from Delhi Technological University and Amira was pursuing Textile Designing from NIFT. What started as friendship, blossomed into love and they started dating. they couldn't believe they were so compatible with each other. Yug was not the macho,suffocating, possessive boyfriends that Amira had heard of and she wasn't the nagging, controlling and tormenting gold-digger girlfriend. They gave each other space but still managed to forge a deep connection.
All was well for about a year and then it started falling apart. Yug was one of those guys who were very popular in college. He was good looking, his family was well off and he wasn't pathetic in studies. Also, he was a good dancer and a leader. Everything was going good for him in the college. People paid attention to him. He got on the Student Council and started taking responsibilities. He became a known face around campus. boys wanted to be him, and girls wanted to date him. Amira was happy for him but she started feeling neglected. She was proud of all that he had done for himself, but it seemed like her achievements didn't matter anymore. When she got selected as one of the designers to showcase her designs in the Indian Fashion Week, she was on cloud nine. Yet, when she told Yug about it, he didn't seem too thrilled. All he could talk about was how much he was looking forward to working on his college fest.
Amira was disappointed and dejected, but she didn't let it get to her. She still loved him but she knew she didn't want to commit to a serious relationship before knowing that this would last in the long haul.
The show was in Mumbai and she had to leave for 2 weeks. She went to Yug's place to tell him about everything and also to talk to him about the problems she was having. she wasn't going to keep things hanging. That's when she received a call from her best friend telling her that Yug was all over another girl in a nearby coffeeshop. She couldn't believe it. She refused to believe it. So, her friend called her over to the place to see for herself. She couldn't believe her eyes when she saw him openly flirting with that girl. That's when she realised that this wasn't the first time someone she knew had told her about seeing Yug with a lady, and every time she'd just shrugged saying it was a friend. She had always given him the benefit of the doubt because she knew that he would always come up to her and tell her if anything was going wrong. She left the place that night, but she knew that she had to talk to him about it before it was too late and they became one of those people her friends laughed about.
Suffice to say that it did not go well.
Amira left for Mumbai the next week. She was worried about Yug because they hadn't really hashed out all their problems. But, she knew that he would never do anything to hurt her. He might not be the perfect boyfriend but he was still her best friend. She had faith in him. And, she wanted to concentrate on the fashion show. She wanted it to be perfect. It was her chance to make a dent in the fashion industry with her style statements. The first week passed in finding and finalising looks and getting all the things ready for the models. The dress rehearsal was perfect and everything was on track. She was ready to make the most of this moment.
When she came back after the show, she was still reeling in from the effects of what happened in Mumbai. She had never expected to be noticed by one of the leading fashion designers in the country and to be given a chance to intern for his fashion house. She couldn't wait to tell Yug the news. She knew that things between them weren't really good, but she was ready to forget everything. He deserved a second chance and she knew that they were not over yet.
But, that did not happen.
They broke up. He asked her to reconsider. He wanted to get back with her. She said that this was the best thing for the both of them. She never told him that she had seem him with another girl, doing much more than just flirting. She didn't tell him that she cried all night over the fact that she didn't just lose her boyfriend, but she lost the guy who was her best friend.
Amira graduated from NIFT. Her parents threw a party in honour of her graduation and starting her internship in Mumbai. They called all her friends from college and high school. Yug was invited too. She was glad to see that he was doing well for himself. He came up to her to congratulate her on the graduation and new job.
"I had no idea that you got a job in Mumbai. That's so cool. You'll be designing for real celebrities now. when did this happen?"
"Thanks. Oh, the internship was offered to me when I went to Mumbai for the fashion show"
"Huh? When did that happen? Was it back when we were together?" asked a surprised Yug.
"Yeah, remember I told you I had to go to Mumbai for 2 weeks? They offered me the internship after the show. It doesn't matter. I see you're happy now."
"yeah, I am. But, it could have been us if you'd only listened to me once. I was ready to give this another chance. I never knew why you broke when you could have given us a second chance. It could have been perfect."
"Is it really the time to talk about it? you might blame me for the break-up but I think it was the right thing to do. you're happy with Samira now and I'm really happy for you. Enjoy the party."
People find it so easy to blame someone for an outcome they don't like. "if only you did this, if only you listened........", the list will go on. It's so easy to just burden one person with the guilt of making a decision. What we seem to forget is that regardless of who we want to blame for something that went wrong, it's finally us who has the last say in the matter. Life is not a one way street. Yes, people get scared and yes, people are afraid. But, if we roll over and let others guilt us into doing something, we're no better than them. The Blame Game will only continue as long as someone keeps feeling guilty.
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